Yesterday was a tough day for me. I woke up with a sense of uncertainty looming over me and that’s not normal. I’m that perky, happy woman most non-morning people want to strangle. I always have a smile and am ready to face the day, but not yesterday. Something felt off, but I went to work and did my job like I normally do. It turned out to be a regular day so by the afternoon I’d gotten over that terrible feeling.
When I got home from work I called my editor about some things I felt needed to change in my book, but wasn’t sure how to go about doing it. We discussed it, but I still wasn’t satisfied with the answers so I did some research, and that’s when my whole world came crashing down.
I learned that I had made a major mistake in the way I wrote my entire book. This mistake was fixable but would be very tedious and time-consuming. My husband came home and found me in tears. “I give up. The book is over,” I said.
He listened patiently as I explained the disastrous mistake I’d made and thought he would agree with me, that it was just too much to do, but he didn’t. He told me I was not giving up, and that together we would go line by line and fix my book. I guess I didn’t realize that throughout this whole journey God wasn’t only working on me, He was working on my husband too.
I still felt defeated and discouraged when I went to bed. How can I even begin to fix this Lord, I prayed. I didn’t sleep very well and was awake by 3am. I grabbed my phone and checked my email for my daily devotionals. I smiled when I saw the titles of two of them and noticed that they had both arrived in my inbox around 2:20am. One was called “Trigger Points of Doubt” and the other was “Completing the Work”.
The first devotional was from a woman who told about being paralyzed by self-doubt. She faced something she’d never done before, and felt like even though she knew it was her calling she couldn’t complete it. She got through it with prayer and scripture, reminding herself that with God nothing is too big or too much to handle. She quoted Philippians 4:13. “I am able to do all things through Him who strengthens me.”
The second was about following God’s call. That whatever work He called you to do, He would use you as His instrument to accomplish it as only He could. The verses quoted were Jeremiah 33:3 “Call to Me and I will answer you and tell you great and incomprehensible things you do not know.” and John 17:4 “I have glorified You on the earth by completing the work You gave Me to do.”
I put my phone away and felt renewed. I closed my eyes and a song came to mind. It was “Only a Mountain” by Jason Castro. If you don’t know this song it’s about overcoming anything through Christ. I didn’t know all the words so I looked it up and smiled when I read this verse.
Ask like you believe it
Trust like you can see it
Take your fear and say
There’s nothing in your way
Even when it looks big
Even when you feel small
Just a little bit of faith can change it all.
To me, all of this was God saying-Robin, quit doubting Me. I gave you this, now get up and get back to My work.
I’m on it Lord!! I know He didn’t bring me this far to let me fall on my face. He never said it would be easy, just to do it. My book may take a little longer before it is ready to make its public debut, but that’s okay because it is all in His timing. I think He didn’t want me to release a book that wasn’t written correctly so He used that conversation with my editor to show me how to make it right.
So if you call or text me at night and I don’t respond, just know that it’s because my husband and I are busy climbing the mountain that is my book, and we will give God all the glory every step of the way.
Today if you are facing a mountain in your life and are filled with doubt and on the verge of giving up I pray that you call out to Him and begin your climb. He is there for you, waiting and wanting to help you reach the top, you only have to believe.
Many blessings to you,